Everyone loves movies. Some people claim to prefer outdoors activities such as playing with a ball or hiking, but they are lying. They would rather just sit and watch a movie, because that is what nature wants us to do.
But how can we watch movies if we don't want to pay for them? This is a question that has taunted the great philosophers of every age. Finally, we provide the answer right here, right now.
Actually, this question has already been answered several hundred times on the internet. The problem with all of these answers is that they only explain how to watch mostly BAD movies for free.
Sure, there are some good ones mixed in. Some great ones, actually. But we've SEEN those ones. We want MORE.
First let's examine some traditional ways to see movies, for historical perspective, and to pad this blog post.
1. The theatre. This is a building that occupies three-dimensional space in a place known as "outdoors." So I have to go through the door that leads to the hallway of my apartment building, and then I have to CONTINUE WALKING through the hallway until I reach the OUTER door of my building. Unbelievable. At this point, I must open THAT door, and step into this so-called "outdoors." Then, I have to somehow get this "movie theatre" place. And I have to be there at a certain time, because, and this is the really crazy part, THEY ONLY SHOW MOVIES AT CERTAIN TIMES.
That's right, THEY tell US what to watch, and when to watch it. Because, it seems, we are a bitch.
2. Netflix. They pretty much have what we want to see, and they deliver it to our homes, where we live. Take careful note of the distinction between Netflix, then, and the theatre: the theatre is bullshit, a crime against humanity, where a prison-style regimen of attendance is enforced in order to cause suffering. Netflix, on the other hand, lets us watch movies according to our own schedule, in our homes, which seems closer to the concept of freedom outlined in the Constitution, and further from the brutal, extortionist dystopia of repression and pain that theatre owners have in mind for us.
And yet. Netflix makes us wait too, don't they? With Netflix, we cannot always get what we want to see WHEN we want to see it. Even IF the title we want is available right away (and that's a big if), we still have to wait for the mail to come, like a cave man, sitting helplessly in the dirt, with no access to personal computers.
Don't even tell me "Oh, but there's Netflix Streaming." I defy anyone to name more than two movies on Netflix streaming that are worth seeing. I am so sick of looking at the "Watch it again" selection on there, where they keep all both of the good movies, hoping against hope that they will add another one.
3. A far better option is to rent movies online on a pay-per-view basis. You can do this at YouTube, iTunes, Amazon, and probably other sites too. Actually, this is really an awesome way to watch movies, and so what if it isn't absolutely free. Kind of defeats the whole purpose of this article to be honest. But that doesn't matter.
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLEB4BFF87F4244C65
